I was a little morose last night. Came out of nowhere. Nothing I felt justified in pouting over. It was my own past deeds bringing up some well-earned guilt. My wife was patient with me as I worked through it. That is beyond long-suffering, especially since prior to my unexpected attack of conscience, she was very much in the mood. She waited it out and like other storms in the past this minor squall passed. We had a "lovely" time, and full of whatever chemical is released to keep the male from jostling the work-product after delivery, I fell to sleep.
I awoke still a little chagrined, but determined not to bring my self-abuse into the new day to cast a cloud on a very nice day here. When I don't feel good about myself, I withdraw, turn in. I was determined not to so silly as it sounds, I accepted her forgiveness by asking for a back rub this morning. (I know, I know, big of me huh?) But it worked, I was feeling connected and loved and accepted. I always am loved and accepted, but I struggle.
When she sleepily tired of scritching. I rolled over to scratch her, er, uh, front I guess. She didn't roll over so I did my best to keep it chaste and affectionate rather than sexual...I failed miserably......
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