Saturday, November 24, 2007

The exigencies of parenthood...The Husband

Two years and a day ago we were having kinky raunchy animalistic sex. I believe the moment was actually captured on 8 mm videotape at the time. At the end of a marathon session that began as we waited, bored for the Black Friday line to begin forming at our local Walmart. We had our eyes on the $400 HP laptop for the fellatio artist. Who new the consequences of that Thursday night.

With our youngest child finally in school we were getting re-acquainted in the kinkiest of ways in every room of the house on school days. We hadn't actively taken any preventative measures but years of infertility left us feeling that the sex was more recreational than procreational. We had had trouble with conceiving and after a little plumbing re-route to cool the overdeveloped blood supply in my testes,had resulted in a quick succession of our 2nd, 3rd and 4th (and we thought last) child.

Despite standing in line for several hours rather than the approved legs in the air like a dead cockroach fertility pose, one of my boys defied gravity and swam up through her hostile acidity and the very last one, a runt to judge by the size of the offspring, diving through the membrane of one of her last eggs.

Flash forward two years, we have a lilliputian toddler who is demanding and spoiled completely out of scale to her size. We now own that second laptop, so we type kinky things to each other via the audience of the whole world in a blog as the toddler tries for the umpteenth time to chew,bend, yank or otherwise molest the fragile power cords and their connection.

That last post, just scant moments ago began with promise. The small but evil one was out cold and the wife was naked on the futon we have thrown on the floor in desperation for some privacy and some ability to fuck at anything more than a languorous don't-wake-the-baby pace.

Lo and behold the wife cellphone chimes in mid pump...her sister from her delightfully open-minded family excused herself when my wife explained she had caught us mid-coitus.

The damage was done. The beatific smile on the little urchin's face is heartwarming, but a bit of a deflation in my er, well ardor. So I guess that just means the extraneous sperm production will be held in reserve to gush forth in copious quantities later.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hey.

Y'all might want to come back and put your comment under the correct post.

:D